Alive

A lot of people struggle with faith because if God is good then why does he allow bad things to happen to us? Even his most faithful servants often get the most painful moments. I struggled with that too, the year behind me was the worst I could’ve had with friends dying, friends being diagnosed with severe illnesses, people I love ditching me, and my own struggle with depression. I felt in pain, alone, and not able to rationalise that bad things happen because it felt like that was those were the only things happening to me for a while. Until I realised three core truths to myself:

  • In every good and bad thing, there is good.
  • Nothing happens without a purpose, everything serves a purpose
  • God is in control and he doesn’t let bad things happen to torture you, he always has a plan and reason.

It’s helped me get through basically every hard thing that’s happened in the past year. And once I realised that I also realised that I’ve had some amazing things happen. A year ago I got baptised, I got out of a very toxic environment and fought back my depression, my parents are moving to Netherlands, I found a sense of home in my church, I made amazing friends, I. am. alive.

It’s changing the perspective that also gets me through those harder times. And I know when I don’t have the strength to carry on, I get to lean on those around me. The thing is, people have a free will. God made it like that so following him would be a choice instead of preplanned. And yea I struggle with that too because he knows the future, he can control the future, and yet we have a free will. Because of that free will there is evil in the world and bad things happen to people we love and ourselves.

You can’t control the bad things, stop them from happening, but the power that you do have is to be there for those you love, do what you can to turn the bad things into good. The world is already such a hateful place, it won’t help if we only focus on the bad things that happen. Through those bad things that happened I learned to see the good. I got baptised because I realised I would have been dead if my faith hadn’t convinced me to stay, I may have dealt with severe depression but it got me out of the most toxic relationship and that’s something I’ll always be thankful for, my friends have gotten diagnosed with severe illnesses and its taught me to appreciate life even more and the moments we do have to make them count, people I love leaving me taught me that I don’t NEED others to make me happy, my friend dying taught me that we have one chance, just one chance to make a difference in this world. She only reached the age of 11, and I know her life already impacted hundreds.

I’m not saying it’s easy to let go of the bad things that have happened, they need attention and healing, but also a reminder to always stay thankful for what we do have and to live for those moments. Today I’m thankful that I am alive.

 

Picture credits: Bored Panda

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