Currently there are 14-15 million couples going through a long distance relationship in the USA alone. With travel becoming more and more popular and people moving out of their home countries long distance friendships and relationships are becoming more and more relevant as well as common to teenagers. The truth is that long distance is inevitable for TCK’s whether it’s friendships or relationships. Long distance relationships can put a lot of anxiety and tension because communication needs to step up as well as consideration. These relationships take 3C’s: commitment, communication, and consideration.
Long distance hurts and it can suck a lot at times. You’re often/constantly missing the person and hate not being able to be with them physically. Video calls and texting helps ease the pain a bit but nothing beats a good hug when you’re missing your partner to the point of tears. You get worried when they don’t reply to your message when you need them to and don’t know what they’re up to. You get worried because you know if something happens, there’s honestly nothing really you can do. However with all these negatives it is best to distance yourself from these anxieties and fears. I know it’s easier said than done, but when you allow yourself to worry about these things it will drive you crazy. Trust me I know from experience. During the time of distance your mind will easily play tricks on you so you have to fight that and can’t let your anxiety get the best of you. The thing I learned helps a lot is keeping busy and trusting yourself as well as your partner that nothing is wrong with them, with the relationship, they are simply not able to always get back as fast as we would like.
Despite all these negatives, there are also definitely benefits to doing long distance. Even if the situation is not preferred or by choice, there comes along all the more reason to see the positive side of things! During a long distance relationship you are privileged with the time for self development. You have this time to become the person you know you are and want to be. It is important to grow as a couple, but not to lose your individuality. Your individuality and relationship should be growing simultaneously. Another benefit is that distance forces you to grow in communication skills. There are no distractions because all you can do is talk, so it is important to use that time to challenge yourselves and improve your skills in that. A very important method to grow is to communicate and talk about issues and differences during a relationship. When you are doing a long distance relationship you are most likely in different countries (though cities is possible too) so you are both gaining vastly different experiences. This is a perfect time to use to immerse yourself into your current culture and learn as much about the place you reside in while you can. Later you can share these experiences with your partner and through that you can both grow together. Lastly, the most important thing a long distance relationship can do is test if your relationship is built to last. Distance really tests the intentions and commitment of a relationship and those who work on the relationship daily and give it all the effort they have will make it past the distance.
Something very important I learned while doing long distance is to keep communication open whether you’re happy with each other or angry at each other. Communication is what I find one of three most important things in relationships and the moment you close communication you doom the relationship.
All in all long distance is a very up and down situation, and like everything there are pros and cons but it is definitely important to keep your mind on the pros and work through the cons. I hope this was of help and if you have any questions or comments feel free to contact me, I’m still learning. What I write on this blog is what I have learned as I’ve gone through this journey but I know there’s still so much more to learn.